Amanda Szurkowski

Amanda Szurkowski

Dear Mom,

I want to thank you for everything that you have sacrificed and done for the betterment of my siblings and I.

I want to thank you for the countless hours of sleep that you sacrificed to stay up to teach me, to help me, and to be there as the biggest support system in my life. You have never once doubted me or my capabilities when I have. You have never once questioned if I could do something because you know I can even if I don’t believe it myself.
You have done so much for me and I can’t even begin to describe how much I value all of your efforts. I’m deeply sorry that I do not appreciate everything you have done and are continuing to do for me. You sacrificed everything to get me where I am today. You gave up a job that you loved so much and were doing so well in because I was more important. I honestly don’t know if I could just give up something I love so easily. But you did without any hesitation because you knew that nobody would take care of me the way that you could. I can’t even begin to describe how thankful I am for that. This is just one of the many sacrifices you made for me so that I would be better off in the long run.

Thank you for being my best friend. I know that you say we aren't friends and that you are my mother first, but I know you are also my friend. You may possibly be the truest friend I will ever have in life. You are the only person who can look at my face and know if something is wrong when no one else could even tell. You support me, listen to me, and push me to achieve something greater, even when I don't think I can. You have taught me how to be a strong and confident young woman and showed me that anything can be achieved if you just work hard for it and want it bad enough, and for that, I am forever thankful.

Thank you for trying your best to give me everything you never had in life. Thank you for presenting me with opportunities that you were never even able to reach, let alone complete due to your parent's circumstances. Thank you for all the sacrifices that you made so that I could get further ahead, even if that meant you were suffering in silence. You have never once complained or made me aware that you had been sacrificing because you did not want to spread that stress with us. Thank you for keeping a smile on your face when things were tough, but always making sure that we were oblivious to problems around us. Only now as I grow up I begin to only realize slightly how the world works. I understand prices and various expenses with taxes, the mortgage, hydro, etc. Not once, though, have we gone without. Not once have I ever felt as though we may have been struggling. Thank you for shielding me from the burdens you carry, and instead, helping me carry my own as well.

Thank you for always putting us first even if that means you are at a disadvantage. There have probably a countless number of times that you were suffering because you would rather give to us than yourself especially if you knew you could only pick between either us or yourself. You are always looking out for our well being, and you are willing and ready to do whatever it takes just to give us the opportunities we would never be able to achieve on our own. I cannot see how selfless you are and how selfish I am. It seems as though you are limitless. I continue to take from you, and you continue to give to me. Not once have you ever asked for a single thing. Not once have you ever complained about anything at all. Not once have you encumbered me with anything that may have been bothering you. Instead, you kept it to yourself so that you wouldn't see me upset because you knew that I couldn't handle that kind of stress. I cannot begin to express how thankful I am for this.

Thank you for being involved in my education. I finally realize that you don't know it all, which was kind of shocking but I know that you do everything in your power to make sure that I am doing well and getting help if I need it. You are the one person in my life that I can turn to in a time of need and I know that you will always be there for me. You have been the greatest influence on my life. When I was younger I had always wanted to be you. You exude every quality I have ever wanted since I was a child. You're good at honestly everything and it makes me kind of jealous. You are smart, you are kind, you are social, you are helpful, you could literally excel at any task thrown your way and I just know that you would be great at it. Now, just imagine if you had all of the opportunities you have given me.

But now you are sacrificing too much. In putting so much time and energy to teach us right from wrong and to pave the way for our future, you have failed to take care of yourself. You neglect yourself because others seem to be more important, but that is not the case. You are important too. You need just as much love and care as I do. You need to be supported just as much as I do too. You are ok being dealt with last because other people are more important then you are, but again you have it all wrong.
I know that your parents were definitely not as supportive as you are to me, and I want to thank you for that. You have provided me with everything I need to succeed in life, even though sometimes it may not be the fanciest or best, or what all the other kids have, I now realize that you always give me the best of what you and Dad can afford to give.

When I got my acceptances you were happier than I was because you were so proud of this achievement.
I was initially skeptical because I know that I cannot afford the cost of university, and that was something that was holding me back. But again, without any hesitation, you're willing to work crazy hour shifts just so that I can have the chance to go get my education. I can't begin to express my appreciation for you and the hard strenuous hours that you work just so that I can be better off than you.

I love you with every piece of my heart, and it scares me that I will be going off next year by myself and starting a new chapter in my life without you there with by my side. I am just hoping the facetime connection works well! I figured to write this to you because you deserve to hear the things I often think about but may go unsaid, unheard and unnoticed. Thank you for all that you do for me and the gang. I couldn't ask for any other mum because I know you're the best there is!!